Because Google and Facebook have been battling for internet dominance lately, does this mean we should be expecting a Google Movie soon in retaliation?  I’d like to make some bold predictions on the casting choices for this nascent Google Flick (lets call it ‘The Algorithm‘).

Sergey Brin played by Bronson Pinchot (Balki from ‘Perfect Strangers’)

Larry Page played by Steve Buscemi

Eric Schmidt Played by Rainn Wilson (Dwight Schrute from ‘The Office’)

And of course…the antagonist Steve Ballmer, played by Alan Dale (Charles Widmore from ‘Lost’)

I chalked it up to another strange dream, until I was on Facebook the other day and BAM, there’s Lyle right smack dab on my homepage as a ‘recommended’ friend.

First of all, I’m not sure how Facebook figured out to recommend Lyle.  He isn’t friends with any of my other friends.  He doesn’t live in the same city as me.  We didn’t go to the same schools or participate in any of the same groups or activities.  I’ve heard that Facebook may pull from an ‘email’ list if you’ve allowed them access, but my only email correspondence with Lyle was via a now defunct account.   So why did Facebook suggest Lyle to me?

The most likely scenario is that Facebook  is  attempting to control my dreams.  Lyle’s mug must have been sitting on my homepage for a few days and managed to creep into my subconscious.  If not for Facebook’s recommendations, I could have avoided an awkward Sushi dinner with some random guy.  Who knows, I might have dreamt about surfing in Hawaii or living on Mars.   Lyle invaded my dream and I couldn’t do anything about it.

Another new Facebook feature, ‘Reconnect,’ attempts to get you to write on a friend’s wall that you haven’t corresponded with in a while.  Another clear attempt to push random people into our dreams.

Don’t worry though, I can smell Facebook’s dream control plot from a mile away.  Slowly, but surely, you’ll start seeing more random faces in these recommended friend slots.   These random, uninvited individuals will continue to invade your dreams: playing with your dream pets and barbecuing your dream spareribs.  Then, one day you’ll recognize one of these faces in a TV commercial,  a viral video or a magazine ad.    You won’t know this person but you’ll like them for some strange reason.  And you’ll buy their brand name bleach products and anti-depression medications.

Call me paranoid, but I’d bet the farm that Facebook’s various friend finding functionalities are modifying the contents of dreams around the world.  Why don’t you think back to that last random person that popped into your dreams.  Then go and log into Facebook and see if they’re staring right back at you.